Thursday, July 2, 2009

Sleep please

Josh is one now, and still waking at least 3 times per night. I have not slept more than a 3-hour-block, in over a year. Raising him on my own, this gets extremely draining. I am sure this also has something to do with my weight gain. Research tells me this, it's not an excuse. Honest. It also might have something to do with my postpartum depression. That on top of the death of my mother shortly after Josh's birth and dealing with the fact that Josh has Down syndrome. (something that I now see as a positive-if you asked me a year ago, I would have never imagined saying that)
I've tried many methods, but he just doesn't sleep. I even tried to "Ferberize" him, but that method was too emotionally draining. I can't just let him cry because he doesn't stop. The crying escalates and it seems like it's the end of the world or he's in a great deal of pain, even though he's not. His teeth are a factor; being trisomy 21 his teeth come in arbitrarily to begin with and cause lots of swelling. 
He has a regular bed routine, a proper crib free of pillows and toys as experts suggest, he couldn't care less for a pacifier, and he's got a soothing aquarium that plays calming, quiet music. I rock him to sleep with a bottle and I realized that this could be a mistake. I could actually be creating a crutch that he relies on to sleep which is why he cries upon waking and can't go back to sleep without me soothing him and giving him a bottle in the middle of the night. But if I don't give him his bottle he will cry for hours. 
Is there a secret out there that I don't know about? 


  1. welcome to motherhood...and that of a child with DS. This will be a beautiful journey for you, one filled with many memorable joys as well as difficult challenges. Don't doubt yourself as a parent, just remember that each child is raised differently and that you are doing the best you can every day. Do what your instincts tell you to and don't beat yourself up about what you "should" be doing.